Time has been the focus and theme of my life right now. It seems with more on my plate that there isn’t enough time in my day. I have been working on how to manage it, pace myself and allow enough time to get things done.
Being that it is the theme of my life right now it was very synchronistic that I got to go through a magical labor and birth with the totally awesome Dr. Paul Crane last week. The over all theme over her labor was time. Dr. Crane allowed us time. We had the time to labor at home, time for her cervix to dilate, time for baby to drop and get into the right position, time enough to push and tons of skin to skin time afterwards for bonding.
Over the years of doing the work that I do I have often found that women aren’t allowed time to have and birth their babies. It’s different if you have a midwife or a home birth but in hospitals women need to be given more time. (obviously if there is trouble with mommy or baby it’s a different story) Dr. Crane allowed us to push for almost 4 hours (something most doctors won’t let you do) He was a big boy, but my girl because of allowed TIME pushed her baby out. Over the course of pushing she actually grew stronger. There is a natural powerful force that we have as women that takes over you in labor if you surrender and allow it in. It’s the strength of the great mother who will do anything for her children.
Dr. Crane was telling me during labor that he lead a talk earlier that day to his fellow colleagues that women need more time in labor. That the C- section rate is way way too high and could go dramatically down if they were allowed more time to labor, especially for pushing. Well Dr. Crane last weeks amazing birth was your conformation !!! I bow to you sir !!!
I am friends with labor and delivery nurse all over the United States, and they have told me all kinds of stories about how doctors try and control the time and pace of labor to fit their life. They say things like, ”At 12 am start pitocin so I can make my kids soccer game in the morning”. Soooooooo not cool !
A few weeks before I worked with another totally FANTASTIC doctor Paul Hackmeyer. The first words out of his mouth after seeing us in his office in the morning was, ”You and baby look great, go home and labor for as long as you can, I will give you all the time in the world to have this baby as I am not on any schedule other then this baby and yours." I hugged him and said, ”OMG I love you, you are AWESOME !!!"
For you ladies, please note - Labor takes time !! Especially for first time moms. The average labor for a first child is 24 hours. Knowing that, it is important to pace yourself and manage your time and energy wisely . Think of running a marathon , you wouldn’t do it on no sleep , food or water . You wouldn’t use up all your energy at the start knowing you have a long way to go and that last mile was going to require all your strength, Of course not. Take your time, labor at home for as long as you can, hire a doula to coach, support and guide you so you can better ride the waves of each contraction. If it is very early on in labor like in the middle of the night try and sleep or rest. Throughout the course stay hydrated, eat little meals and snacks, relax in-between contractions, learn pain management skills such as breath work, meditation, visualization and massage (all those I do throughout labor with my clients). Prepare yourself before with yoga and exercise again you wouldn’t run a marathon without training for it. Also babies have their own timing of when they are ready to be born. I know the end is can be really uncomfortable. Of course you can do try and do things to bring it on and help labor along but just know and trust that your baby will come when they are good and ready. There is a natural divine timing to all things.
Anyone who lives in LA and is looking for a great doctor I highly recommend these 2 fabulous men !!! They have been doing this for a very long time and are both extremely passionate about what is best for both mommy and baby. Not to mention they both were so present and spent so much time with us during the labor. If ever or when I have a baby and if I decide to use a doctor vs a midwife, I can tell you right now one of these guys will be by my side during labor and birth.
Dr. Paul Crane – (310) 659-5810
Dr. Paul Hackmeyer – (310) 967-4325
Lori Bregman